Fadzayi Maposah Correspondent
I had a hearty laugh when I read on social media: Getting old is like living in a haunted house, you hear sounds that are not there, something on you is always creaking and the screams are endless!
What the person forgot to mention is that there is a ghost that moves and hides your things and when you are moving around looking for your things, the things just disappear!
One day I was sitting in the lounge relaxing, more of resting really, after looking for my mobile phone that I then discovered was on the stool right next to me! It seems that the housemates (another name for family members…) need to realise that things should not be moved unless they are in places that pose danger to the owner`s health.
An example of a place that poses a danger to the owner`s health is when a mobile phone is left in the bathroom where it could accidentally drop into a bucket of water.
If you are asking what a mobile phone would be doing in the bathroom, then know this, you are still young.
Those who are getting old like me know that a mobile phone can be anywhere even in the garden! And it is not rare to then ask someone to call your number as you ask other housemates to go around the house or even outside on a mobile phone hunt!
Young housemates do not like these hunts at all, hate is the word. When the mobile phone or keys (which are even more difficult to find as they do not have ringtones!) are found, the young housemates hand over with looks that are loaded with many words which remain unsaid.
The reason why the housemates get upset is that when you are busy misplacing the things you will be very confident, so sure of what you are doing and when you are asked ` Do you know where you have just put your mobile phone?`
You are quick to respond yes, then a few minutes later you initiate as a matter of urgency, Operation Find Mobile phone!
I divert, back to my relaxing moment. I was minding my business, just seated as I said because I had lost a bit of energy. I heard a sound as if something was rubbing one of the lounge windows, looking up I let out a scream. I could see a hand holding something that was moving up and down on the window, the face was all black. I looked up again. Then I realised that it was my second daughter Takudzwanashe who had a mask of activated charcoal on her face.
I remember telling her that she will give me a heart attack. Her remark was that no ghost would appear and then start cleaning windows as she was doing. I was quick to remark that I had heard many stories where ghosts were alleged to have cleaned houses and even cooked meals…
I then asked why she had `blackened` her face. I received a quick correction, face had not been blackened, it was a face scrub that she had put on.
The purpose of the face scrub is to cleanse the face. Cleanse the face of what? I ask. Toxins is the answer I get. Toxins from where? I continue asking from the sofa while looking at her face in total amazement.
The response to that: “I will explain more when I get inside, let me just finish this”.
When she finally finished her window cleaning chore and came back into the house, I had started something else and forgotten that I had asked a question that still required an answer. She just said she would explain later and we left it at that.
It was only when I saw the “sooty” face sometime later that I remembered that she owed me an explanation. Unfortunately, she was in a rush and could not stop to explain. She referred me to Google if I was very eager to know and was not prepared to wait for our discussion. I said I would wait but the forgetfulness bug kept getting at me.
After sometime I got used to seeing my daughters with sooty faces. When I was no longer having a heart miss a beat because of the scary faces, thinking that I had overcome this new phobia, the masks changed. One day I was horrified to turn in the kitchen and watch my daughter with a green face walk in. I was informed that it was an avocado face scrub.
I have seen different face scrubs like the Biblical Joseph`s coat of many colours. Some face scrubs seem to cause havoc to the face as I have witnessed my daughters rushing to the bathroom to wash if off. Then occasionally I hear giggles as the `experiment` is declared a failed one.
The face scrubs and the quest to have smooth and clear faces raid the kitchen and rob it of groceries that include spices ( yes, I have seen the cayenne pepper container diminish as it landed on someone`s face!), mealie-meal, eggs, honey, just to mention a few items.
According to my daughters there is one thing that does not give in to the many scrubs.
The one thing that has defeated the face scrubs home and away is the `it` experience pimple and for some more than one pimple.
This pimple or pimples signal that the `it` experience is imminent or even stay on a few days after the `it` experience just to say that the experience has passed by. The pimple or pimples for some is huge and cannot be missed. It stands out! The masks that people wear due to Covid-19 are a blessing in disguise honestly as they cover the stubborn `it` experience pimple(s) which leave many women sure that there is need change the saying: as stubborn as a donkey!