Zimpapers Logo

Trymore Nyamapfeni
As a boy who grew up in an extended family, whenever I write, I put in mind that most times it is easy to take someone through the path you have walked before.

In this journey, I have encountered hard workers and the lazy ones — employers and employees — all of them have something to point fingers at and blame.

Some blame their race and wish they were not black. This is so because they think the good things only happen to the white people. Some also blame their tribe. One once said, only if it was not because of my wife, things could be better and some blame their sex.

Even if it is true, what gives you the insight to have what to blame?

It should instead give you the insight of how to solve the problem.

Considering the fact that Zimbabwe is in need of problem solvers, you need to start by solving your own problems before you help others.

One good man once said, to be a leader you have to be able to lead yourself first. In order to be successful you need to stop blaming other people for your own inability.

Be able to tell yourself ‘why not?’ Whenever something new needs to be done, this will surely improve you as an individual.

One day I took a closer look at my life as an African and to my surprise some of the things that happen to us today, started at an early stage while happening to our parents.

You might wonder how but this is how, when I was growing up I watched my brother Terrence walking, he fell down, my mother would then run to him and ask him what happened, and immediately my mother began hitting the ground chanting that it is the one that hurt my son.

This was just meant to calm my brother from crying and making him feel better, but truly, it was not the ground that made him fall ,but unfortunately the ground is blamed for something it is not responsible for.

This has matured in most of us that whenever something happens to us as human beings we are ignorant to take responsibility, but rather find someone or something to blame just for us to feel better.

In my brother’s case, my mother should have simply told my brother that he fell because he was not being watchful on his footsteps and that way he will develop a character of acceptance and responsibility and as human beings that’s how perceptions start growing in our minds.

I say stop the blame game and unlike my mother there is no point in telling someone what they need to hear only to make them feel good about themselves, we need to break these chains and have more problem solvers than trouble causers.

Past is past and it cannot be changed let us focus on the future which is like a question paper which needs to be answered whether you are prepared or not, start preparing today and be able to take responsibility of your own actions

The life journey itself empowers, grants courages, wisdom and means to success. If you travel this road you will gain experience that can be achieved by yourself only. I refer it mostly to the journey from ignorance to knowledge, fear to courage ,paralyses to powerfulness, victimisation to accountability.

Be able to learn the simple lessons of life, don’t get stuck in the dark road, don’t blame others for your own errors and never expect all your problems to disappear in life, always see what is inside yourself and manage that before blaming other people. Stop the blame game .

The writer is an inspirational speakers and motivator.