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Were we not all shocked by the outgoing Harare City Council Town Clerk Tendai Mahachi’s outrageous demands making his exit package? Unfortunately for him, and fortunately for common sense, the Harare City Council very handily invoked its rights under common law to give Mahachi his marching orders on three months notice – probably the only case that the woeful provisions have been put to good use.

When we heard of the latter development, the temptation was to laugh out loud at Mahachi, ma good laugh like, hahaha hahaha hik hik kkk. But when you get down to it you know that there is nothing particularly funny or worth the mirth, even schadenfreude. We are in such a big tragedy that clouds the little mirths.

Mahachi and his ilk represent what is wrong with our present day administrators and leaders of companies. At a time when they have run down and degraded their organisations they have no sense of shame at all. It is the same with your Cuthbert Dube or Happison Muchechetere. These are people that have paying themselves obscene amounts of money when the services they were supposed to deliver have been poor at best and non-existent at worst.

The cases of ZBC and PSMAS are telling. At the moment, let’s say for many years, the State broadcaster has been been sticking out like a painful and burning finger of shame no one wants to be associated with because of its poor content which derived directly from poor management. To think that Zimbabwe had a broadcaster well before other African countries!

The ZBC has remained suspended somewhat back in the early 1990s – which to a large part explains why everyone looks back to those days with nostalgia: reminiscing about the newscasters and programming, chiefly Ezomgido and wrestling and everything in between. It doesn’t come like it used in those days. And this is not just nostalgia about good old days.

When an institution fails to move with the times and management is static and unadaptive ZBC is what you get.

Tragedy!

It is a tragedy when you get predatory management like Muchechetere and his kind who strip further the institution of its assets and dignity. While ZBC was reeling with obsolete equipment and unpaid workers Muchechetere and his acolytes were living like some Arab oil sheikhs with Muchechetere himself having a particular notoriety for raising this immodesty higher as he would enjoy the whisky-and-cigar opulence even at his office when his employees went for months on end without getting any salary.

We know these guys, our friends, brothers, sisters, relatives and everything else who would just live in the hope that something would wake up right.

It never.

Things actually got worse and these guys were sent home with nothing after slaving for the company. ZBC has retrenched hundreds of employees, just like many other companies. The Harare City Council intended to fire a whopping 3 000. These are people who had nothing to do with the collapse of the fortunes of their companies: they are victims of mismanagement, which is the case with most of these companies that have sacked people wantonly.

The management have been awarding themselves happy packages that were not cognate with the performance of the companies. The management were awarding themselves hefty packages and allowances which they did not justify in terms of deliverables. They feasted on elephant yet they only managed to kill mice.

They employed their relatives, girlfriends and girlfriend’s relatives and gave them ill-desrved perks. They increased and pampered useless support staff while the core business and workers suffered. With the demise of of the companies, the first victims were the very same long suffering workers.

How unfair!

Now our Mahachi thinks that he deserves to be treated better than the other 3 000 and go home a millionaire after running the city aground. What nonsense is that? He cannot be allowed to be more equal than the other workers. Here is when we expect the common law to make common sense and be the great equaliser. Mahachi should come down his high horse and accept the reality.

In other times and places Mahachi should be walking from Town House straight to jail.

What now, Mr Tsvangirai?

President Mugabe presented his State of the Nation Address this week which touched on several issues impacting on the economy. The 10-point plan he outlined should provide guidance to economic activity in the short term and we hope everyone in Government is hard at their bit as we speak. As expected, the President’s address elicited different responses.

We are, however, baffled by what came from his chief rival, Morgan Tsvangirai of the MDC party. Short from offering a reasoned and sustained critique of the President’s presentation, Tsvangirai said in Bulawayo: “All I can say is that the President failed the people of Zimbabwe by failing to tackle the main issues that this country is facing.”

Then he told us: “When a Government fails, to the extent that Zanu-PF has failed, the only honourable thing for that Government is to step down and call for elections. “I see no reason why we should continue with this policy vacuum; no strategy, no policy, no thrust to rescue the economy of this country, if there is an economy to talk about.”

Hold on! Is this the same Tsvangirai who was only yesterday talking about “no reforms no elections”? Because the suggestion is so nonsensical as to warrant any discussion here, the only question that begs answers is whether Tsvangairai has changed his mind on elections and participating therein.

We are pretty sure that before or soon after his suggestion of President Mugabe stepping down and calling for elections, he was preaching his gospel of “no reforms no elections”. You would be surprised at such a feat of saying one thing with one corner of the mouth and saying another with the other corner if this were not Tsvangirai, our Tsvangirai.

He is a flip-flopper, a serious and serial one. But come to think of this: Tsvangirai is well known for boycotting and threatening to boycott events and processes, including elections. A sobriquet he once had that he is Mr Boycott.

Now, if President Mugabe were to miraculously accede to his demands Tsvangirai would certainly boycott the elections that he precipitated! Only legends do that. And legendary flip- floppers.