Zimpapers Logo

Tendai Rupapa in Maramba-Pfungwe

FIRST LADY Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa, the elderly, schoolchildren and members of the community under Chief Chinhanga in Mtawatawa yesterday fought back tears when a young woman shared a harrowing personal tale of disobedience which led her to marry at 15, endure physical abuse and ending up with physically-impaired children.

In a tear-jerking testimony during Dr Mnangagwa’s Gota/Nhanga/Ixhiba session, the 25-year-old woman who lost her eldest child, said she regretted why she did not listen to her parents and urged young girls and boys to shun drugs, early marriages and focus on their studies.

“Mhamha, I wish to thank you for visiting and spending some time with us. I have come in support of your educative programme to share my personal experience highlighting the dangers of rushing into sexual relationships before time,” she said as she wept. 

“I got married at 15 years of age. At 16 I had my first child but sadly he died. The second and third born children aged six and eight are both disabled. In my marriage i encounter many challenges like domestic violence because i will be accused by my husband and his family of giving birth to children with disabilities and being regularly bashed because of this. Every time my husband comes home while intoxicated and physically abuses me.

“I advise my younger sisters here today to value their education and consider marriage when the time is ripe. When being sent to school let us respect our parents and thank them for that. If you have an opportunity to attend school, value it. Some of us did not listen to our parents. 

“I would have left my marriage long ago because of the abuse but I cannot because my father says if you want to come back home, come alone because you were alone when you left this homestead. He does not want me to bring my children along. 

“My mother is late. Who will then look after them when they are not even accepted where I am married including by their father because they are disabled? My sisters, do not rush into marriage, put education first and had I completed my education I may be in a better position than now. You should be grateful that we have our mother, the First Lady who is always there to guide you. Take her teachings seriously and they will help in future. Do not be like me and do not do what I did.” 

Everyone in the nhanga, including Amai Mnangagwa, could not fight back tears while some of the girls openly wept after hearing the touching story and her appeal to other girls.

Girls raise hands to ask questions and share their views during their interaction with First Lady Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa and elderly women in a nhanga session at Chief Chirinda’s Homestead in Maramba-Pfungwe yesterday.

Dr Mnangagwa pledged to help the woman and her children. 

She thanked her for opening up and teaching her younger sisters.

The mother of two was made an Angel of Hope Foundation ambassador who will visit schools around Maramba-Pfungwe teaching other girls on the dangers of early marriages.

To the young girls, the First Lady implored them to take seriously what the woman had told them.

Her story dovetailed with Dr Mnangagwa’s call for children to focus on their education and shun drugs, early marriages and behaviour that put their lives into disarray.

With the help and teachings of the First Lady, elderly women, the girls prepared dried vegetables with peanut butter, rupiza, sorghum sadza, mabumbe and rice.

They were taught to pound and winnow millet.

They also ground rapoko on stone which the community refers to as Mashava.

Boys were taught chores expected of them around the home including slaughtering and preparing goat meat.

An elder teaches boys how to prepare goat meat for a traditional meal during nhanga/gota/ixhiba session at Chief Chirinda’s homestead in Maramba-Pfungwe yesterday.

The First Lady, elderly women from the community took girls through the Nhanga session while traditional chiefs and other elderly men taught boys in the Gota.

“Vanambuya, my visit here has been prompted by what our children are doing nowadays. As we grew up, we didn’t know these things that children are now doing at a tender age. These children are our future leaders therefore we must teach them so that they grow up with good manners. Do these girls appreciate that they are important and their bodies are delicate? Are they valuing their education and what kind of friends do they have? Today let us teach our children as they also ask questions freely.

“Vanangu, I have liked your ability to prepare traditional dishes that we taught you today. These dishes are nourishing and we grew up consuming them with our bodies getting strong. If you play with boys, what will come at the end of the day?” she said in a question that seemed to throw the cat among the pigeons.

Aubrey Mapidigu (16) responded: “This is where people fall in love before time is ripe resulting in pregnancy and you drop out of school, thus destroying your future.” 

This dovetailed with the views of her colleague, Charmaine Maruta who said: “True Amai, the moment we start developing breasts and going on our monthly cycles we think we would have grown up and start doing things that are not of our age and this affects us.”

Dr Mnangagwa reinforced the view and said once one fell pregnant, it spelt doom for them.

“My daughters the moment you fall pregnant before the time is ripe, your life will be ruined. The boy will proceed with his education while as a girl you can only do so after giving birth. Concentration level in class, will it remain the same? Will you be able to balance education and breastfeeding?” she asked.

All the girls concurred that the two would not balance and this would affect their studies.

Another girl who was part of the programme confessed to dating at an early age and confirmed that this affected her performance in school.

“Mhamha, I want to confess. I am 16-years-old now. I started menstruating at 13 years of age and at 15 I had a boyfriend,” she said. “I was good in class but the moment I started dating my performance deteriorated such that my teachers were concerned because I was a bright student. 

“I later realised that I would fail my ordinary level examinations because I was putting extra effort in the relationship at the expense of my studies. That is when I improved in class after ending the relationship. The boy was even putting pressure on me to sleep with her, had i not ended things with him, probably i would have rushed into marriage and not finish my studies.” 

Her colleague shared an almost similar story.

“We children of nowadays, the so-called ama2000 view failure to have a boyfriend as a sign of weakness. When the boys propose to you, they demand sex to make them believe that you are really in love or else the relationship will be over. Fearing to be dumped, I yield to the demands. If you refuse you are said to be backward, ‘kudhara ikoko’,” she said.

Yet another girl weighed in: “One other problem with girls is that we can’t dress well. We put on revealing clothes which result in our brothers-in-law playing horseplay with us, resulted in one bedding their sister’s husband. Our dressing is immoral,” she said.

The wife to Chief Chinhanga praised the girls for being frank.

“My daughters we are happy that you are being frank showing that you want to learn. Let us thank the First Lady for coming here to spend time with us because you have learnt quite a lot,” she said.

The children were grateful for the teachings they received and promised to follow them to improve their manners.

“We want to thank you for the teachings you brought us here Amai. We have learnt a lot and have grasped a lot. My mother has never sat me down teaching me as a girl who is growing up. I do not think she even has the time because she spends time on the phone. I do not visit my aunties and grandmother because they are not in good books with my mother. That is where we end up doing drugs as a result of peer pressure,” one of the learners said.

The First Lady implored the children to reject love proposals while at school.

“From today learn to say no to love proposals from boys and men while at school. Apart from having boyfriends before time is ripe, what else is bad and unacceptable at your age?” she said.

In response, the children said drug abuse, stealing and venturing into beerhalls.

“From today you must police yourself and stay away from bad things. Refuse horseplay with your brothers-in-law because it will end in tears,” the First Lady said.

Gogo Eurita Bakasa asked the children the household chores they were performing and the children pointed at cooking, washing utensils, doing laundry as well as cleaning the house and the yard.

The First Lady spoke out about the drugs menace that is rearing an ugly head countrywide, including in schools. 

Only last week, eight girls were expelled from an elite school in Harare for taking drugs.

“Are people in rural areas like this place also doing drugs?” she asked.

The girls all confirmed that drugs were awash in schools where some students were selling them to their peers.

One child gave an example of a school she once learnt where she said people abused drugs and the school security guard would be paid to turn a blind eye. 

She said there was also a teacher who was involved in selling the drugs. She said together with her friends, they went to report to the school head but no action was taken instead the teacher hired people to assault her. 

“My children do not believe in people, say no to drugs and follow the correct path. Say no to peer pressure from those who are doing drugs. Drugs destroy your health, your future. That is why we came to talk to you about drugs that are stressing us countrywide,” she said.

The First Lady also took the girls through menstrual hygiene before giving them reusable sanitary pads.

In the gota, Forbes Chikono paid tribute to the First Lady for visiting his home area with her constructive and informative teachings.

A boy asks questions and shares his views with elders, while his peers listen during a gota session organised by First Lady Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa in Maramba-Pfungwe yesterday

“I want to thank the First Lady for coming here to teach us morals that were practiced long ago. Nowadays values have been lost because us youths no longer listen to our parents or elders. We are spending time in the streets taking drugs like mutoriro which are ruining our lives. If you look at some of our peers, they now look older because of the drugs they are taking. I thank Amai for coming to give us wisdom. In the Gota we learnt that back then a man would marry at 25 years of age and not nowadays when one does so at 15. When they fall in love, after one day they well be living together. That should not be the case. A girl should also wait for her time, 18 years and above. I wish those norms and values return so that we live well,” he said.

Tashinga Mazorodze (13) said: I thank our mother who came among us today to teach us that drugs are very dangerous. We learnt that our parents did not rush into marriage like the children of today. We learnt that a boy would cut firewood that would be placed at the dare where fathers discussed with their sons on who to marry and when to.”

Simbarashe Mapira said he had learnt a lot due to the First Lady’s visit.

“I thank the First Lady for the opportunity to learn that she has granted us. I learnt that the Gota is the hut where boys sleep. We were taught norms and values that set the foundation for a brighter future,” he said happily.

Mr Joshua Chikono, who is Chief Chinhanga said he yearned for a time when people respect their cultural norms and values.

“Today we were giving children teachings that they must follow like we did in the past. Sons would marry at 26, 27 or 30 years of age. Girls would do the same. A girl’s breast was tough and you would swim with her in the rivers without anything happening. We want children to follow that way of life. Children are stressing us as they put on many trousers at one time. This is an important gathering. In the past boys would look for firewood for the dare and not stay with mothers in the kitchen. Children here are taking Musombodhiya, Mutoriro, guka and mbanje. We have lost many people here including girls because of these drugs. Both boys and girls are abusing drugs. The highly potent spirits which they consume are now cheap as they are sold at US$1for four bottles. I thank amai, the First Lady for reintroducing nhanga/gota. She wants today’s youths to be morally upright. She has a good heart and as traditional chiefs she has our support,” he said.

After the sessions, the First Lady later addressed thousands of villagers that had gathered where she stressed the need for unity, to shun drugs and to respect the country’s norms and values.

As health ambassador, she warned people against losing their guard on Covid-19 saying it was critical to mask up, wash hands and observe social distancing.

Amai Mnangagwa further encouraged people to get vaccinated.

Men and women who work with Chief Chirinda perform a traditional dance during a nhanga/gota/ixhiba in Maramba-Pfungwe yesterday.

“The pandemic is still wreaking havoc, claiming lives worldwide. Therefore, to prevent Covid-19, we have to be vaccinated that is taking all the three vaccines including booster shot,” she said.

“I am happy we have come together as one family. When I come, I do not come as the First Lady but as a grandmother, aunt and mother. We have come to discuss and counsel our children together because once born, a child belongs to the community. We want to return to the olden days because Gota and Nhanga were there since time immemorial and that is where our children were taught good morals. I have come so that we teach our children good morals. Our children are ruined by drugs. Education begins at home before they go to school and it is essential for us as parents to have time with our children. We heard in the Nhanga session that schoolchildren are taking drugs and selling some to others. This was unheard of during our time. If they were dabbling in drugs, our grandparents would not be here today. 

“What do our grandparents say about Gota and Nhanga?”

Sekuru Stewart Mutore described the programme as educative and helpful in efforts to arrest the surge in drug abuse.

“This programme is important because we passed through it during our time. Those who did not pass through this programme are the ones mostly abusing drugs and doing shameful things. We believe your interventions and programmes will help the children,” he said.

The First Lady implored the elderly to form groups that teach children regularly with an eye of moulding them and not sexually abuse them.

Gogo Susan Chinjere concurred with Dr Mnangagwa’s call for the elderly to regularly teach children who were now stubborn and refused to be assigned tasks at home.

“Momz iyoyo haiite manje,” the granny triggered laughter saying this is what her children says whenever she assigns them tasks.

Part of the crowd that interacted with First Lady Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa after a nhanga/gota/ixhiba session in Maramba-Pfungwe yesterday.

Minister of State for Mashonaland East Provincial Affairs and Devolution Aplonia Munzverengwi praised the First Lady for her educative programmes.

“Your programmes are important to the whole nation Amai. We are not surprised seeing you being honoured by other countries because your programmes are import and your works are there for everyone to see,” she said.

Boys and girls who participated in the programme were given certificates of attendance and food hampers.

Those who taught them also received hampers, courtesy of Dr Mnangagwa.