God, the creator of earth and Heaven, is no doubt a skilled creator. One thing that never ceases to amaze me is that at times, he creates amazing creatures and one wonders the motive. In human beings, God at times creates a man with a big body, but with a non-corresponding brain capacity. More often than not, you find a huge man with the brain the size of a full stop.

You see, Zimbabwe has gone through a lot and you find a man with a little mind like Promise Mkwananzi of the Tajamuka ignominy. Nothing and virtually nothing reasonable comes out of his head. Just a few days ago, he failed to read the situation in the country and called for a mass stayaway. The reason, because the Government of Zimbabwe has taken the route to re-introduce its own currency, the Zimbabwean dollar. We stand to be corrected if his brain is bigger than a full stop. His kennel capacity, could be lower than all other primates.

Promise Mkwananzi

Typical of those with no brains, he was holed up in South Africa himself, but urging others to act against his own country. It does not go much more sinister than that. But like, my brother The Villager, would have put it, “stupidity, like a silent fart, soon announces itself through smell.” It is hard to hide. Promise Mkwananzi was to be discovered hiding in South Africa, thinking he is clever.

I am sure the donors, Crisis Coalition International and others who have been favouring Takamuka with funds, must be sulking and licking their wounds of humiliation. A normal person should read the times and indeed, read the mood. Even, a fool in Shakespearean times, would know his time. Was it not Julius Caesar, who said a fool must know his time. Our people have matured and can no longer be taken for granted by the less brainy.

Our people no longer need this tajamuka nonsense. They want food for their children. Our people are tired of the violence and the aftermath. Only a fool will think that the solution is to burn and loot. No, Promise Mukwananzi, no. Stop it!

Loice Matanda-Moyo, Welcome
Well, one thing for sure is we want to welcome Justice Loice Matanda-Moyo, the new Anti-Corruption Commission chair. We wish her well. Her few speeches are refreshing and giving us hope. In one of her speeches, she touched on Government Ministers and officials stealing State property and donating it to their church prophets. Well, well, well, and well. Phew! This is what is called opening a Pandora’s box. Walter Mzembi, whom we understand is changing name to John Malethi, as he remains fugitive to the law of his country and his deputy then, Anastancia Ndhlovu are chief culprits. We are told, it is a known secret in the Ministry of Tourism and Hospitality Industry that some of the property donated to the Government by the United Nations World Tourism Organization (UNWTO) which included huge street television screens were donated to Walter Magaya’s PHD Ministries.

In this file picture former Foreign Affairs Minister Walter Mzembi (left) arrives at the Rotten Raw Magistrate Courts in the company of his lawyer Mr Job Sikhala (centre) in Hararew. — Picture by Lee Maidza

To his discredit, the man of God was not given the vision by his maker that his gifts were stolen Government property. Our mole tells us that Ndhlovu was so much into Magaya, that although Mzembi resisted at first, he eventually gave in. What with the power of women?

Mzembi, a power-hungry fellow, also wanted anointing to get the UNWTO top job and thought the donation would unlock anointing value from the charismatic preacher and make him win the UNTWO secretary-general’s job. It was not to be. He lost the election. And, Mzembi wept! Magaya got the loot for free. Magaya should bring back the loot!

Between the chains: when police sleep on duty
The world over the genesis of corruption and crime is the failure by police and the judiciary to coordinate. The more educated the criminals the more it is lucrative for them to sustain white collar crime. They always find a loophole to slide to the backwaters.

We all know that there has been a porous gap between our judiciary and police and criminals have taken advantage of that.

Can anyone explain to us why and how police are failing to arrest at least one of the 26 convicts who are walking free in Harare despite losing their criminal appeals at the High Court?

The convicts’ warrants of arrest were issued upon dismissal of their appeals, some years ago, but the police have not yet re-arrested them. Can we still say we have a police force?

Most of the criminals just noted appeals, but avoided prosecuting them, prompting the Registrar of the High Court to throw them away, as per law.

The 26 are supposed to be serving their sentences, but they are unlawfully enjoying their freedom.

The Herald exposed the scam two week ago, but police have not yet taken any of them to court, meaning none has been apprehended.

Our mole tells us the guys have been buying their freedom, paying police officers not to arrest them.

Now one wonders if police Commissioner-General Godwin Matanga’s retraining exercise is working? We all thought a re-branded police force would do things differently. Honestly this is a shame.

While still on police, we all know the rot in the traffic section. Today, just go to any roadblock and see kombi pass-by with touts hanging precariously on the back of kombis. Kombi without papers! Chiremba Road is worse.

Hatfield police is useless. Every morning you find them stopping kombis and even chatting with the touts hanging there. My foot. But you see, a police force that cannot arrest mere touts clinging precariously on the back of kombis, cannot be expected to surely arrest sophisticated criminals out on bail, pending appeal and whose appeals have been thrown away. Am sure, we are expecting too much from this police force.

President Mnangagwa’s anti-corruption drive is being dealt a big blow by police. Kombi drivers are still paying bribes in broad day light. Touts are still harassing commuters day in and day out. Kombis are straddling lanes, causing untold commotion and using non-existent lanes. They do what they want because we simply do not have a police force. The kombis oil their sleeves, every day.

From Cairo with Love
Well, the juicy news from Cairo is that the Warriors, had sets of matches on and off the football pitch. One of our sisters is said to have turned a busy provider of the other goal area, albeit without a goalkeeper.

While Warriors fumbled at every opportunity to score on the football pitch, forever scared of placing the ball between the white sticks, they found fleshy chocolate cream sticks between which they scored big time in their rooms. What an easy target! It is the fad of our time. Another sister, known to have been a perennial provider, is said to have grown older and slow and was out-smarted by “Freshly Ground,” as the younger sister became known. Cry our beloved worriers!

Sunday Chidzambwa

Back to our young sister, she is said to have made a killing, charging the players cash in United States dollars and giving the players slots for Nichodimous matches. At one time a fist fight is said to have broken off as she became an instant hit. Well, they say she is a ZimAsset. Some players struggled to pay her, hence the intermittent demand for more payments from Zifa. We could soon find our sister driving a sleek vehicle, if she applies her mind on the cash in. They say she bragged about her plan. Good luck sister, you never know when the next afcon finds you.

Do we then have to wonder what game Sunday Chidzambwa and his technical team were coaching? One does also not need to ask if Chidzambwa and his technical team were coaching and playing, the Nichdimous one, too. I am sure what is coming out is that Chidzambwa’s bench is more technical on the other game than football. To their ancestors be the glory!

But you see, this is the legacy of Felton Kamambo and his entire Zimbabwe Football Association executive, that they led by example carrying their own “personal assistants-cum-night nurses”, much to the chagrin of the nation.

The nation had hope in Kamambo, the man from Guruve, who unlike Philip Chiyanga, who could not kick even a stationary ball, once played football in Mhangura, but his Zifa is an equal disgrace. We are not going into the match-fixing mantra because one the game is played between the sheets with a sister, it is enough fixing!

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