Let’s not be fashion prisoners


“Fashion should be a form of escapism, and not a form of imprisonment,” said legendary fashion icon Alexander McQueen. I think that means we should enjoy fashion and not become prisoners to it, so does that mean that anything should go when it comes to fashion? A matter of personal choice. Recently I was in Lagos, Nigeria for the Africa Magic Viewers Choice Awards (AMVCA) which was held at the magnificent Eko Hotel and Suites and being a holder of the VIP pass, I didn’t only enjoy the show but the fashion style .

It would be bad and evil not to acknowledge the fashion standards that I came across.

Yes, Nigerians know how to do it, from make-up to glamorous dress, definitely their standards can match the Oscars and Grammys’ because everything was on point on the red carpet.

During our red carpet briefing, we were told that you say: “I was dressed or styled by . . . (name of a person) then the label or shop. That is the exciting thing about fashion; you learn something new everyday.

However, in the same period the Zim Dancehall Awards were taking place and I missed them, causing joy and regret in unequal measures, I am told.

Some believed that they had the look to get the look and lamented that I was not at hand to applaud.

Yet others were not sure that they would have cut the grade and are delighted that the fashion cop was not around to throw them in the back of the truck and cart them off to trend disaster jail.

But there are other cops out there and my inbox was filled from all quarters with judgments of celebrities who wore it better, as well as the best and worst dressed.

Most self appointed commentators said they were impressed because they had expected the dancehall artistes to bring their ghetto street fashion to the awards.

Obviously not everyone could pull off the glamour looks. From the pictures it is clear that some people thought they were going to shoot Scary Movie 8 or maybe the sequel if that one has already been done.

I really laughed at some of the outfits but since I was not there I will desist from commenting or maybe I am just too chicken to tempt someone to come up with a diss song about me. Because let us all face it, those guys and girls sure do know how to dress a perceived enemy down!

But the bottom line, when it comes to fashion especially on red carpet we are still struggling.

And I really cannot resist saying something about my church mate; our “now controversial” former gospel diva Fungisai Zvakavapano whom I heard caused a stir at the recent award after she roared in with an escort of motorbikes while she drove BMW Z3.

Someone came up with a fashion observation that goes: “Your dessert can be my disaster” and I am sorry to say that in this case Fungisai’s choice did not leave me feeling sweet.

She chose to wear a little black dress which is always a wise choice. But the embellishments on her feet and earlobes?

Was she inspired by Mel B of Spice Girls? If so, I would like to remind Fungisai that Mel B was the Scary Spice. But maybe with her rebranding Fungisai has gone Goth and that was her intended look. Remember Riri’s good girl gone bad transformation.

But I guess all that pales into insignificance when one looks at that red carpet pose which has gone viral on social media as people create more memes than the tezvara in shorts ever merited. Fungisai has been crowned the new comic pose diva.

Comparing my Nigerian red carpet experience with the local shows, I think our problem is not that we lack talented stylists. It is that we do not give due respect to award shows. Artistes and organisers alike need to take the red carpet seriously or do away with it altogether.

I urge all fashionistas, bloggers, designers and stylists among others to unite and make this work by developing the sector.

Enjoy your weekend and make sure that if the hat fits you, wear it.

Don’t be caught offside. But of you are, don’t take it personal because that is my job to blow the whistle on your gaffs as your cop on the runway and wardrobe.


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