with Susan in management, all the concerns that women had nursed would be addressed.
After all Susan now had an opportunity, apart from showing her brilliance to the rest of the management team, to also represent women in management.
The women envisaged that the workplace would become more understanding of some of the challenges they face in their lives despite being professionals. Among the issues are the rigours of having to breastfeed, falling pregnant, staying at home to nurse a sick child and attending a school function. 
The women were so happy. They could smell happy times ahead of them. They thought that for once the workplace would be more supportive of some of these realities that women have to face from time, they would become even more productive.
I am sure I speak for many women that there is not much productivity that one brings to a place when their mind is screaming bloody murder. Try keeping a mother from a sick baby for two days and see whether they will do the work with a smile on their face or not. I am sure many a manager will confess that the person may be there in body but will definitely not be there 100 percent. So you can imagine that excitement that permeated the corridors now that Susan had power, real power.
But the women were in for a nasty shock. They fast realised that Susan would not be a pushover. Not only was she tougher than the male bosses they had in the past in terms of sensitivity but she suffered from the worst kind of syndromes too; “the first and only” syndrome.
I first came across the term while watching one of my favourite SABC programmes “Motswako” earlier this week on a programme done especially for International Women’s Day, which we joined the rest of the world in commemorating on March 8.  
The lady guests on the show said while several gains had been made in the lives of women, not only in South Africa, but throughout the world, there still were too many women who suffered from the “first and only” syndrome.
This type of woman is the one who believes that if she is to be a manager, then that privilege should end with her. No mentoring of younger females will happen with this woman. In fact any brilliance shown by her subordinates will get them into trouble. This kind of woman is easily threatened and not just by ideas that may work in the organisation but even by looks of younger women and their energy.
Speaking to several young women in the build up to International Women’s Day I was told that they prefer male bosses to female bosses. For them a male boss is more accommodating of female employees than a woman. They felt that with a male boss they would be judged more fairly than with a female boss.
Now I do not know which is which, because my experience has shown that there are some great men and women who will teach you all you need to know. They will mentor you and give you advice, who will also listen and give you a chance to share some of your ideas. But there will be some women who have some personality issues and that is the real truth and nothing but.
Reading through some literature on women in the workplace, I came across several sections that criticise women for being personal and too emotional at times and as a result this works against them in the work- place.
They are said to always be looking for enemies. So, for example, if this younger woman seems to be rising and rising the natural reaction is to squash them for they are perceived to be competition.
If this man argues a point the natural reaction is to see them as someone who is directly refusing the woman’s authority. What this means is that in the end the woman focuses more time on these enemies, both real and perceived instead of focusing on the job at hand.  
In Susan’s case, her female colleagues fast realised that she intended to be the first and only woman to reach such dizzy heights within the company’s structure. She was not going to waste her time grooming other women for the honour.
As a result they fast turned back to the men and in no time, Susan had been alienated and was only at ease on her own and with those at the very top who paid her salary.         
As we celebrate women’s month I am writing today to challenge the women folk including myself to empower each other. Let us not look at empowerment as something that everyone else, notably men, owes us. We owe it to ourselves and to each other.
It starts with each and every one of us to do something for the next girl and woman. The “first and only” syndrome needs to go.
I am a communicator with a deep passion for health, HIV and gender issues. If I spend a bit of time mentoring some girls and boys too who wish to follow in my path, surely that would be something.
There are many men who have done the same for me listened, believed in me and given me a chance. I am glad to say there have been women too though I wish it were more women than men.
When we begin to empower each other as women, then we would have arrived. Surely it should make sense to find a female boss or fellow woman more approachable than a man? But is it?
Let us think about it as we commemorate women’s month this March. Are we the type of women who think of empowerment only for ourselves and not the younger women who at some point have to run with the baton stick?
Are we grooming tomorrow’s female leaders or we do not want to ever give them a chance?
Let’s think about it. As we think about it here is to a “Happy Women’s Day sisters.”

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