A problem shared is half solved A problem shared is a problem halved Message. Recycled paper note pinned on cork board. Concept Image

Fadzai Maposah Correspondent

There is a saying that a problem shared is half solved.  The adage is true.

A story is told of two men who went to pray on a mountain. There are many people who do the same everyday, go to mountains of various sizes and present their requests in prayer.

One was praying silently while the other chose to say out his prayer aloud.

The one man who was saying out aloud his prayer shouted: “Lord, hear my prayer. I come before you as I ask for a DVD player. I pray that you bless me with a DVD player. I now wait for you to provide in your time”.

The man who was nearby praying silently initially thought he would just ignore the one who was praying loudly. He later decided that he needed to get up and assist his fellow.

While the man continued to intercede for the DVD player and tell the Lord how he would use the DVD to ensure that his children stayed indoors, the other one went to his side and tapped him gently on the shoulder.

The man praying did not stop, he continued with his DVD player prayer.

Another gentle tap did not stop him from presenting his request. Then the man who had started by tapping on the shoulder decided to speak to get him to stop praying.

“It is fine my brother; you can now stop asking for a DVD player. I have two at home. I can give you one”.

Immediately the man who had been asking for a DVD player, started thanking the Lord for an answered prayer before getting up to give his brother an embrace.

They both walked away from the mountain satisfied.

One had had his prayer answered and the other had been able to help his brother.

DVDs maybe not be of much use today, but it was worth the mountain climb once!

For many years I have honestly believed that seeing a piece of soiled cotton wool on a netball pitch with no one able to claim it is probably the most traumatising event that anyone can go through.

And I have continued to talk about is as a way of letting out steam and seeking healing.

Basically I am like that man on the mountain, praying for a DVD player and until I have a DVD player I will not keep quiet.

Then to my aid come sisters to share that there are other traumatising events regarding the “it” experience.

This platform of talking about the “it” experience is like my prayer mountain.

I have had the opportunity to share what I have gone through as far as the “it” experience is concerned.

I have had a few people come forward to share what they have gone through. I am still learning.

I am still open to hearing and learning what others have gone through.

One shared that when she was a teenager and in high school she had a tough male teacher who seemed very eager to embarrass the female students.

What the teacher would do was after each lesson, the female students were not allowed to leave the base room until the teacher had “inspected” the chairs that they had been sitting on.

The boys would leave as soon as the bell rang while the girls would remain seated while waiting for inspection.

The teacher would walk around the class, a stick in hand and when he got to where one was, the student would stand up, allow the teacher to inspect and then leave when he said all was fine.

The stick would come handy when the chair showed signs of the “it” experience.

One would receive some beating for being as the teacher said “a careless girl!”

Those three words were the most dreaded words during her high school years and that teacher’s lesson.

What that teacher did was to relate the “it” experience with harsh words, beating and embarrassment.

When sharing the experience, the lady said most girls dreaded his lessons and although there was so much to learn from the subject that he taught, the ‘torture’ that he put girls through was enough to just hate the subject.

Imagine the number of dreams that he killed through beating girls for mistakes that can happen to anyone.

In girls’ high schools, there was ‘safety’ in class and some ‘accidents’ were taken care of without the male teachers knowing.

One female colleague shared that she learnt how to sit on the chair on her undergarment when she began high school.

She shared that when on the “it” experience, one would lift her school dress and just sit with her undergarment.

This was so that if any “it” experience accident happened, it would be on the chair and the school dress would have no stains!

I guess it is a good thing that she was not taught by the teacher who inspected chairs otherwise many would have received a lot of beatings for stained chairs and clean dresses.

Then she shared that they used to help themselves to the teachers’ chalks, especially the white ones.

They did not want to use the chalk on blackboards at home, no.

When after lifting the school dress and basically sitting on your undergarment, if one spoilt the chair, they would use the chalk that they always carried around.

One would scribble on the stain until it was all covered and then with a tissue “erase”the stain!

Something that is 100 percent natural has left many people traumatised and scarred in various ways.

It is high time that healing is brought to those who have been traumatised and saving others from facing unnecessary trauma.

It is time to tap the sister gently on the shoulder and say: “Stop hurting, do not be afraid. Let us celebrate the ‘it’ experience”.

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