Zimpapers Logo

Beatrice  Tonhodzayi-Ngondo Make A Difference
Would you give a Grade 1 pupil money? Would this six-year-old understand or appreciate the value of money? Is there any point in giving a child who loses their shoes, socks, satchel and whatever else that happens to be unfortunate on a particular day, a sum of money?  Will they even know how much change they should get after buying something when they have not even mustered writing their own names?
Welcome to some of the parenting questions of today.

Parents who choose to do the right and healthy thing by providing a packed lunch for their children are having a torrid time, when the children start throwing tantrums and demanding money just because they would have seen others with some cash.

An older child would appreciate the rules which prevail in his or her home and may appreciate that money only comes once a week, especially on a Friday or never comes at all, as the parents may be like me, firmly of the belief that a pupil needs a packed lunch, juice and water to get through the day and money only for special occasions.

It is a different issue altogether with a Grade 1 child.
At that age, it is hard to convince them to wake up to go to school on time everyday. Imagine if they become convinced that the cool thing to do at school is to carry money.

Just because there are certain parents who have started doling out cash to their children to buy unhealthy tuckshop items, those who do not believe in this practice end up having a torrid time. Several meetings have been called in some schools to plead with parents not to give children, especially first graders, large amounts of money.

As far as I am concerned, US$2 is already a large sum of money. When one gives a child money, two things are likely to happen; they are likely to lose it and spend the day whining and as such, not concentrating on their school work.

The second thing is they will want to show off with it, causing confusion and distracting other children.
It therefore boggles the mind why some people think it is acceptable to give their children large amounts of money to take to school. Is this how we show that we have arrived, and how successful we are?

This takes me to parents who give children expensive mobile phones and iPads. Just what is going on in the minds of people who do such things?
A teacher with a certain private school actually complained that parents today do not spend enough time with their children and want to compensate for this by giving the child money and expensive, yet potentially dangerous gifts.

She said parents spoil their children so much that they end up handing over to the school teacher a little monster who does not take orders or conform to rules and regulations because of what they would have been fed at home.

She said the spoiling has become so bad that parents can even do homework for the child because they do not want to see them stressing, which affects the child’s performance in the long run.

Another school, concerned with some of the food that children are bringing to school, such as pizza and burgers, sent parents a list of recommended foods for children to bring to school, which does not include fizzy drinks, sweetened juices and crisps.

Instead, food stuffs like yogurt, cold meat sandwiches, muffins and fruits were included. The school has noted that there is a large number of obese children at primary school level.

They have also noted that children bring a lot of unhealthy food to school and large amounts of money.
What has become common is that children do not want to eat their packed lunch.

They prefer money so they can buy ‘junk’ from tuckshops. Some schools, to counter this, are now selling only healthy food items at their tuckshops.
But, because these tuckshops are fundraising initiatives, I see many continuing to sell all manner of sweets, chocolates, flavoured popcorn, burgers, hotdogs and everything else that an indulged child will not be able to resist.

They cannot and should never be blamed for this. The foundation must lie with the parents and guardians. When a child has been schooled to do things a certain way, they will stand by that.

But with a generation of parents who are too busy to watch what goes in their child’s bag or pack it themselves, a generation that is too busy to do homework with their child, parents who are hardly ever at home, parents who let their domestic help raise the children, parents who think money and things for their children will solve it all; we have a problem.

I began to appreciate how big a problem it is when my child, whom I do not give money, started demanding cash at Grade One level just because everyone else, to her mind seemed to bring some.

I was glad when I heard other parents speak at a meeting that they are also disgusted about this as it affects their little ones too.
We just hope those who had already begun giving amounts like US$5 to their children realise that it is not wise.

The school authorities actually advised that just giving out a dollar on a Friday, if really necessary, for a treat like ice cream may be the best. If we do not take heed of their calls, shall we turn around and blame the schools later?

Seriously, at some level, parents should take responsibility for their offspring and not leave it to the school, the domestic help, the X Box, television, smartphone, money and everything else. This is how we create bullies and monsters that terrorise others at school.

The school always takes over from where you, the parents and guardians leave off daily and it continues like that. They do not take over your role to be a parent.
Therein lies the difference.

[email protected]