Headmaster: The job I hate most

back-to-schoolGhetto Blast Rosenthal Mutakati
BEING a headmaster is a high-ranking job in which incumbents are assured of a high salary, honour and authority, but all that is not without hidden costs. In some social settings, boarding schools included, liver and steak after every kill are sent to the headmasters’ house, whereupon problems begin.

You pay heavily for being in charge.
Your image is always at stake and at times you are punished for crimes committed by people who learn at your school or even relatives of people who work there.

Popularly known as “Dhamasita,” “Mukuru wechikoro”, “Sakurema”, “Chamangwiza”, “Chamakwengwerengwe” or “Mudhara”, being a headmaster is not a bed of roses.

It is akin to walking on a landmine which can explode anytime because of the mismatch between what society expects you to do and what you can do.

Parents of scholars who spend their time on television at the expense of their studies often want to grind their teeth against the school head oblivious to the fact that no exam is passed through guess work without sincere and systematic study. It can be worse if someone’s child falls pregnant at school.

All sorts of labels are thrown at the headmaster and his team of teachers without any assessment of the affected child’s contributory negligence.

“Ndiheadmaster wekwaaniko iyeye anechikoro chinomitiswa vana kudaro. He is just a useless old chap enjoying the benefits of being related to high-ranking officials in the Ministry of Education, Sport, Arts and Culture,” people will often say while enjoying opaque beer and the shadows of green trees across the city.

Most former students even have the cheek to want to blame the headmaster for their failure to make it in life when they themselves did not make hay while the sun shone.

Being a headmaster is hard blamed for what is beyond you. One is blamed as if you would have committed a crime.
Anenge atori matsvigomutsviriri kufamba kwengoro isina mafuta.

In most social settings, a headmaster is viewed as one with love parallel to that of a hen which puts the lives of chicks before its own. But that is more of fiction than real at the implementation level.

Gentle reader, while yours truly was teaching in the rural areas, matters that affected society were roundly referred to the headmaster for arbitration before being referred to the chiefs.

This goes to show the level of respect school heads commanded within the communities.
Before a young woman eloped, efforts were made to make the headmaster get wind of the situation so that he could keep records and provide wise counsel to the children preparing to start a family.

Headmasters during that time were held in very high esteem to the point of presiding over marriage ceremonies and being asked to give speeches at funerals.

But all that is now a thing of the past as people have now changed their outlook while some headmasters betrayed their trust by proceeding to impregnate women in families in which they were respected.

At parties, people expect the headmaster to drink and eat less than them, lest they start pointing fingers at the man of authority.
“Mamuona mukuru wechikoro uya. Ende haana kumbokwana. Waona matambiro aange avekuita pamberi pevanyarikani,” you will hear people saying, forgeting that they will be at a party where everyone has a right to enjoy themself.

If you happen to pick an argument and people discover that you are a headmaster, they start blaming you without looking at the merits of the case.

The untoward will even kick you, accusing you of making their children fail in class.
“With that kind of a headmaster, do you think our children would pass. All he knows is to demand his rights without caring to ensure that our children are taught well.”

Falling in love with a headmaster raises questions.
The moment people see a woman dating a headmaster, they start accusing her of mischief or trying to milk him of the fees most people think headmasters keep at home.

“We just hope that is genuine love. Prisca is after the money and nothing else.
“Does the headmaster really know what he is doing,” people will always say of the headmaster.

Some people still have the mistaken belief that if they are married to headmasters, then their families will be exempted from paying school fees.

“Zvenyu makaroorerwa nemukuru wechikoro! Mukati muchashayeiko imi musisabhadhare kana mari yechikoro? I wish my daughter the same. She should just start moving in these people’s circles perchance I won’t have to pay school fees for as long as the marriage subsists,” people wrongly say in the communities in which we live.

As I commit pen to paper gentle reader, the new school term has just started and most parents are fighting tooth and nail to ensure their children are not chased for non-payment of fees.

This is the time when people start making all sorts of overtures to hoodwink headmasters.
The coarse and unpolished women who make the bulk of single mothers and even naughty married women, may start offering headmasters free sex just to make their children remain in class.

Headmasters are going through hell and high are the temptations.
Electricians and plumbers do not usually spare headmasters in their quest to earn the extra dollar.

These people will often approach school authorities with colourful offers for kickbacks which usually backfire because of poor workmanship or disagreements that usually come with late payments.

Mugapu renyama mune mheremhere. There is noise where money is involved.
Headmasters by the nature of their jobs oversee staff and at times they have told a teacher to pull up their socks, the same teacher tells the parents that the headmaster is bullying him.

How can an adult be bullied, if one’s work is not pleasing, its headmaster’s duty to have that corrected.
School heads know each teacher’s ability and surprisingly a non performer ends up demanding to teach an exam class.
This a headmaster worth his salt will not agree to at all.

When the results are below standard its the headmaster’s fault. When the results are pleasing, its the pupils and parents who worked so hard — with the ‘drunkards’ of teachers the pupils would have flunked, you hear the community bragging.

Passing is surely marked from a school environment , good teachers and more than will pupils to play their part, that is to learn and revise their work.

Gentle reader, headmasters are part of our communities and to preserve them, let’s fight hard to stop asking for unprofessional favours.
Being a headmaster is surely a good job that I hate the most.

Inotambika mughetto.

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