Entrusting a stripper with a plane

Harare_International_AriportIsdore Guvamombe Reflections
Back in the village, in the land of milk, honey and dust or Guruve, the buzzing of a fly does not turn it into a bee. Never, never, ever! There, village elders with cotton tuft hair say if you think you’re too small to make a difference you haven’t spent a night with a mosquito.
Even if you want to be fun, try sleeping with a mosquito. There is this small guy, who became a menacing mosquito at Harare International Airport.

On Tuesday, far away from the prestigious village in some place formerly called Salisbury by some awkward and allochthonous imperialist and now renamed Harare by the autochthons of the liberation of this country, some small fly tried to make history by trying to sting like a bee.

The effort was not only laughable but made us think the small fly was out of its mind. Or, rather, what had he smoked?

At the Harare International Airport, where an array of metal eagles fly our skies and perch, one of those little guys trained to fly the metal eagles called aeroplanes protested against procedural safety body searches and stripped to his undergarment.

Well, well, well, this villager is told the guy did not have the nicest of all bodies: not even an indication of a six pack but some chubby flesh. Eish!

For moments, this villager is told, there was drama at the airport as colleagues of the South African Airways pilot tried to stop him from taking to a complete birth suit.

One wonders how colleagues, who so revere the pilot as the man in charge of the flying machine, felt when they saw part of his chubby body. But the guy never minded, for, did he still have his mind in place? In fact, Karitundundu, the ageless village autochthon, says the guy’s brain had suddenly dwindled to the size of a full stop.

The next time we might hear the pilot has flown the eagle in the nude.

This villager is not so amused that as a result the South African Flight 025 with about 90 passengers aboard was subsequently delayed by more than five hours to allow another crew from Johannesburg to fly the aircraft back to South Africa after Captain Ginkel, or is it not Ganja, was barred from flying in terms of aviation regulations.

The cabin crew was shocked but, you see, our brothers from the not-so-colourful Rainbow nation must be equally shocked that such a squealer was in their cockpit. What with the disappearance of the Malaysian plane still on the back of our mind!

Can anyone trust such a man in the cockpit? A man with a naked mind? A man with an unsheathed mind?

My ancestors!

The incident occurred in the morning as the cabin crew went through the screening routine at the land of Munhumutapa’s biggest international airport.

The pilot abused himself. He simply undressed at the security checkpoint. He was arrested for public indecency. He paid a fine but in terms of aviation regulations, he could not be allowed to fly the aircraft.

This villager is told by his mole that at the airport that the flight was supposed to leave Harare at 0720 hours but had to be delayed until 1300 hours to allow another crew from South Africa to come to Harare to fly the plane.

Sources at the airport said the pilot was directed by authorities to remove his shoes after detectors had beeped.

The detectors continued beeping resulting in him being asked to remove his belt, something that did not go down well with the pilot. The directive triggered a furious protest that saw him undressing to his undergarment.

Security officials subsequently moved in and arrested Captain Ginkel and detained him at the police post.

Aviation authorities raised concern on his state of mind and felt it was no longer prudent and safe to allow him to continue flying the aircraft given the fact that they were no longer sure of his sanity.

He had to return to Johannesburg as a passenger.

Fairly, this is a pilot who has passed through the Harare International Airport, not once but one too many times and is aware of the security system at the place that not only match international standards but conform to International Air Traffic Association regulations.

What boggles this villager’s mind is why the guy thought he was supposed to get preferential treatment, unless his mind had suddenly dwindled to a full stop? Was it his skin colour that inspired his protest?

That beep showed something or an object was in place it wasn’t supposed to be in and it was the aviation authorities’ right to flash it out for the safety of passengers. The mosquito had other ideas.

 

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