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Monica Cheru-Mpambawashe Lifestyle Editor
Past

1. White weddings for black Zimbabwean couples are believed to date back to the time of colonisation and the arrival of the missionaries. These were mostly church ceremonies with no parties thrown after the exchange of vows. The wedding certificate was a requisite for women to wear church guild uniforms and more importantly for a couple to get allocated a house in the married quarters in urban areas.

2. Real wedding as we know them now among blacks appeared to have become an elitist trend in the 1950s with numbers shooting up in the 1960s. Most of them were held in the villages where it was a free for all.

3. Entertainment was provided by the guests singing. Later on with the introduction of gramophones the bridal party danced at the behest of the guests who made their request with payments of money or small livestock to get the party on their feet.

4. There were two ceremonies with the first one at the home of the bride and the last one at the home of the groom.

5. Part of the bride price paid by the groom helped the bride’s parents offset the cost of their function.

6. It was considered a great embarrassment and disgrace for the groom’s family to be outdone by the bride’s family in giving presents which were mostly in the form of cash.

7. Each person’s present was announced loudly by the master of ceremonies while the giver stood in front of the gathering.

8. The standard menu was of sadza and meat.

Samp was served to the VIPs and later it was replaced by rice served with chicken while the masses ate samp and home slaughtered beef. (Rice was an expensive delicacy and most families only had it at Christmas). Only the bridal couple and their attendants got bottled sodas while the rest of the guests drank maheu, a fermented non-alcoholic beverage.

9. Invitations were by way of letter, word of mouth and the village grape vine. All were welcome.

10. The paternal aunts (anatete/obabakazi) played an integral role in the whole marriage process before, during and after the wedding and had more than just the ceremonial role at the wedding that they are lucky to be conferred with today.

11. The township hall weddings seem to have started becoming popular in the 1960s as the civil war forced some families to eschew their rural homes.

The trend continued into the 70s and 80s before being gradually eroded by special venue functions.

For some people this was a third ceremony in addition to the ones held in the village.

Present

1. After the wedding the bride does not automatically go off for the honeymoon with her groom in traditionalist families, but must go through a ceremonial handover ceremony where her female relatives and female relatives of the groom cook meals for each other to show that they are now one big families.

2. A brother and not the father gives the bride away.

3. The traditional ceremony were bride price is paid by the groom comes first and is considered the real marriage ceremony although some couples wait until the white wedding to consummate their marriage.

For some couples the white wedding comes after years of living together as husband and wife and often after some or all the offspring from the union has been produced.

4. The bridal shower is more likely to be thrown by the bride and groom’s female relatives than by the best lady.

Some women throw their own bridal showers or the groom arranges it for his bride.

5. Even though many people no longer announce presents given publicly, most guest still expect to be told what the parents on either side of the bridal couple will have presented.